Dear God,
I always keep in mind that I am still Your work in progress. By this, I realize also, that I need to have pure thoughts and a pure heart. Only with Your help is this possible. On my own (just between us, Lord), I know I am (most of the time) full of wickedness. I harbor grudges, think ill thoughts about another person, wish someone bad fortune... This is not the kind of Mom I want my DS and DD to see. I want them to see a Mother who has a heart and a mind just like Jesus.
There are days when, I feel like I am experiencing a "spiritual high", and it's easy to think pure, pleasing, good, and upright thoughts, and to walk closely in Your ways. And on some days when I am having some spiritual struggles -- like when DH and I have a fight -- I think of discouraging thoughts, and frustration fills my heart and mind. Isn't it Lord, just the other week, I cried out to You and blamed You for having a not-so perfect marriage... I'm so sorry, Lord. My actions and eventually my words and attitude on things and people around me become affected. I also suffer a lot as my relationships crumble down. I know I can share all my grievences to You because You are my best friend, but forgive me for dumping all the blame on You.
I do not like it when emotions control me, Lord. Please give me the strength to be pure in every situation. I would like to be controlled by Your spirit, and be able to become a light, especially to my DS and DD. Use me to become an example of purity to them, and to be an inspiration in their eyes on how they should be as they grow up and face the world.
but the conduct of the innocent is upright.
Proverbs 21:8
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